The Lie of Pain

At a Celebrate Recovery class, which is a Christ-centered, 12-Step recovery program for anyone struggling with hurt, pain or addiction of any kind, I heard someone say, “The avoidance of feeling pain is what leads to all compulsive behavior.”

I knew that was right. 

Who wants to feel pain? No one! But in John 16:33 it is recorded that we will all experience trials and tribulations. 

They will come in various packages for all of us, but the truth is pain seems unavoidable in this broken world. So we must learn to process it. 

If we don’t choose to engage in the grieving process (even in the smallest losses of life) and give that pain over to Jesus, we will be avoiding pain. And we will eventually find an unhealthy way to cope.

For me, an unhealthy way to cope with my fear of rejection, abandonment, abuse from men was by masking it. I would pretend the pain wasn’t there by numbing it with vodka after vodka after vodka. 

I became so cautious around men that I couldn’t function. The fear that led my life in this area was crippling. 

I feared rejection so much that for decades, I believed it was my protector. I was obviously very deceived. But Fear pretended to be my friend; it said it would protect me. 

But Jesus accepted me and that is enough. 

Scriptures

1 Peter 5:7 ESV: Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Romans 8:31 ESV: What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

Discussion

How have you experienced pain in the past? What did you learn?